Wilkinson's Hydro 5 Razor Review

  An inability to understand often leads to feelings of anger and distress. Take, for example, rap buffoons the Insane Clown Posse whose famous inability to comprehend the machinations and working theories behind magnets leads to their venomous, impotent rage. Take, also, most racist Daily Mail readers whose misinformed stance on other nation’s countrymen, and the perception they “take British jobs”, comes from their inability to grasp that most of the financial chaos, and thus job shortages, in the UK currently comes from fiscal mismanagement by the highest strata whose avaricious pursuit of money has led them well astray of tried, tested and mutually beneficial Keynesian policies. Take these as examples.

   Today’s post is centred on a subject I personally don’t understand. Yet, rather unlike the anger expressed above, my ignorance is somewhat blissful and hardly something that inspires self-defeating rage. (It is anger which seems to shrink the mind more than any other emotion so it’s something I try and steer clear from as often as possible.)  The subject in hand is the new Wilkinson Sword Hydro 5 Power Select I’d heard so much about but had struggled to comprehend – what exactly was it that made it so much better than average razor? How could multi-speed vibrations affect the quality of a shave if they did so at all? How did I manage to shoe horn a needless tangent on my left wing economic beliefs into an article on shaving? These were all things I aimed at finding out through my pursuit of understanding.



   Using this razor is a peculiar experience although not necessarily a bad one for the most part. The gentle buzz is soothing and if the feeling that a thorough shave being achieved is merely a placebo, it's an effective one. Slowly moving the razor around the face is something of a soothing experience and if, as I have for research purposes, a Bic disposable razor and this Hydro 5 are used in quick succession its easy to see how easier it is to shave with the latter; that there should be no worries about causing irritation due to an unduly blunt blade is also a bonus.

   The main con, however, and this is something which will probably stop me ever purchasing a razor like this again, is another one of its unique features - it's lubricating system/hydrating gel resevoir. This over complex terminology is pretty much shorthand for the razor emitting a stringy, mucilaginous, ravine-like  gooey substance mid-shave which is as unpleasant as it is unnecessary (I don't know of anyone who could possibly wish for additional lubricant mid-shave if the had done an adequate job of adding an appropriate amount of gel or cream beforehand). The one unique selling point of a battery operated manual razor should have been enough but this additional feature over egged the pudding somewhat. The equivalent would be an electric toothbrush which, mid teeth cleaning, spurts a mouthful of additional paste into your mouth - but stringy and cheap paste which is a totally different one to the toothpaste you have selected to use because, you know, its good. Idiotic feature.

 

4 comments

  1. I just wrote an epic comment theorising the optimal number of blades on a razor, then my phone ate it. Now I feel like the moment has passed.

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    1. I hate it when that happens. Would love to read it if you ever get the moment back though!

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  2. Interesting review Kieron! I looked at this razor last night while writing an article on body hair maintenance. :-)

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    1. I know loads of people are raving about this... but I'm not sure I get it. I don't hate it... it's just the one feature which really put me off.

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